And yet, persecution and tribulation had become so great that he [Paul] was weary of life itself. Fear and trembling had come on him, and darkness had enveloped him, as you have heard when it was read in the psalm. That is the voice of the body of Christ, the voice of the members of Christ. Would you like to recognize it as your own voice? Then, be one of Christ’s members, and hear what the psalm says: Fear and trembling are come on me, and darkness has covered me. And I said, Who will give me wings like a dove, and I will fly and be at rest. Is not this similar to the cry of the apostle when he says, so that we were weary even of life? It is as though he were suffering weariness from the slime of the body, for he was longing to fly to Christ while the abundance of tribulations was impeding his flight without rendering it impossible. Yes, he was weary of life, weary of this life; for weariness is not to be found in the everlasting life, to which he refers when he says, For to me to live is Christ and to die is gain.^[1]

As for the person who wishes to be lifted up by the hand of Christ, let him first fly away himself, let him have his own wings, for one who flees from the world has wings. And if he does not have wings of his own—and perhaps only the individual who is able to fly has them—if then he does not have his own, let him get them from the one who has them. Thus a person who flees from the world does fly. Behold, I have gone far off flying away, and I remained in the wilderness. Thus, David flew away like the night raven in the dwelling, like the lone sparrow in the house.^[1] Now if you apply this to Christ, he flew away in the passion of his body, so that he could protect the peoples of the nations under the shadow of his wings.^[2] He flew away from the Godhead; he remained in the body and dwelled in the desert, so that the children of the deserted wife might be more than those of her who had a husband.^[3] Therefore let us seek after Christ’s body that we also may rise again; for where the body is, there also will the eagles be.^[4]

Typologically, however, the desert where John [the Baptist] remained separated from the allurements of the world designates the lives of the saints, who, whether they live as solitaries or mingled with the crowds, always reject the desires of the present world with the whole intention of their minds. They take delight in clinging only to God in the secrecy of their heart and in placing their hope in him. This solitude of mind, most dear to God, is what the prophet desired to attain with the help of the grace of the Holy Spirit when he said, Who will give me wings as of a dove, and I will fly away and rest? And as soon as he had secured this [solitude] by the Lord’s help, he gave thanks, and as though reviling the entanglements of ordinary earthly desires, he continued, Behold, I have withdrawn afar in flight, and I have remained in solitude.^[1]

But what especially strengthens us in our desire for union with you is the account of your reverences’^[1] zeal for orthodoxy—the fact that neither by a vast number of treatises nor by subtlety of sophisms was your firmness of heart overcome, but that you recognized those who were making innovations contrary to the teachings of the apostles and did not consent to cover over in silence the harm done by them. Truly, we have found great grief among all those who are clinging to the peace of the Lord because of the manifold innovations of Apollinaris of Laodicea,^[2] who has grieved us so much more in that he seemed to belong to our party in the beginning. In fact, any suffering from an evident enemy, even if the pain is excessive, can somehow be borne by the one afflicted, as it is written: For if my enemy had reviled me, I would verily have borne with it. But, to experience some hurt from one who is of like spirit and an intimate friend, this is most certainly hard to bear and holds no consolation. For, him whom we had expected to have as a fellow defender of the truth, him, I say, we have now found hindering in many places those who are being saved by perverting their minds and drawing them away from the right doctrine.

So one who does the will of God is his friend and is honored with this name. He who is of one mind with him, he too is his friend. For there is unity of mind in friends, and no one is more hateful than the person who injures friendship. Hence in the traitor the Lord found this the worst point on which to condemn his treachery, namely, that Judas gave no sign of gratitude and had mingled the poison of malice at the table of friendship. So he says, It was you, a man of like mind, my guide and my acquaintance, who ever did take pleasant meals with me. That is: it could not be endured, for you did fall on him who granted grace to you. For if my enemy had reproached me I could have borne it, and I would have hid myself from him who hated me. An enemy can be avoided; a friend cannot, if he desires to lay a plot. Let us guard against him to whom we do not entrust our plans; we cannot guard against him to whom we have already entrusted them. And so to demonstrate all the hatefulness of the sin he did not say, You, my servant, my apostle; but you, a man of like mind with me; that is, you are not my betrayer but your own, for you did betray a man of like mind with yourself.

Putting aside, therefore, conceptions due to common usage, let us reflect on the meaning of to live in life and to die in death and also to live in death and to die in life. I believe that, in accord with the Scriptures, to live in life signifies a wonderful life of happiness and that it seems to point toward an experience of life’s natural functions joined and, by participation, mingled with the grace of a blessed life. This concept, to live in life, means to live in virtue, to bring about in the life of this body of ours a participation in the life of blessedness. On the other hand, what does to die in death mean if not the disintegration of the body at the time of death, when the flesh is devoid of its customary function of carrying on life and the soul is unable to partake in life eternal? There is also the person who dies in life, that is to say, one who is alive in body but, because of his acts, is dead. These are the people who, as the prophet says, go down alive into hell, and she of whom the apostle speaks: For she is dead while she is still alive.^[1] There remains the fourth category, for there are those who live in death like the holy martyrs who give up their lives so that they may live. The flesh dies, but what is good does survive. Far from us, therefore, be the thought of living as participants in death. On the contrary, we should face death and thus become sharers in life. The saint does not desire to be a participant in this life of ours when he states, To depart [this life] and be with Christ.^[2] This has been much better stated by another: Woe to me that my sojourning has been prolonged.^[3] The psalmist was grieving because he had certain limitations due to the frailty of this life, since he hopes for a share in life eternal. Therefore I can . . . state that, although to live in life is a good thing, to live for life would be of doubtful benefit. One can speak of living for life, that is, for the life of eternity with its struggle with the life of the body. One can also speak of living for life in another sense. Anyone, even a pious person, can have a desire for this corporeal life of ours. We can take the example of one who thinks that he ought to live so virtuously as to arrive by his good actions at a ripe old age. Many people who are in weak health, but who still find life a pleasurable thing, are in this category.

Just as the most holy David blames the stubbornness of miserable and unhappy people who decline to be changed from evil to good during the course of this life, so he announces the coming punishment of divine retribution, saying, For them there is no change, and they have not feared God. And lest they who were not willing to be changed vainly promise themselves that they will receive the forgiveness of sins at the end of their earthly life, he then added, He extended his hand in retribution. The beginning of this retribution starts when the wicked person, receiving the reward that his error demanded, by a just judgment is allowed to remain in his wickedness. The completion comes when, for these same iniquities, he will be tortured by eternal fire. Nor should this retribution be considered small by which the wicked person, deprived of the light of justice, is permitted to wander in his darkness, prejudged not by blindness of the flesh but of the heart. This also is relevant to the accumulation of retribution, if the blind person not only is unable to perceive the light but also with pleasure seeks to increase the darkness of his blindness.

If it does not make you weary, let me point out, as briefly as possible, specific references to prophecy in the Gospels, so that those who are being instructed in the basic elements of the faith may have these testimonies written on their hearts, lest they should be surprised by any doubt they may entertain concerning the things that they believe. We are told in the Gospel that Judas, one of Christ’s friends and associates at their last meal together, betrayed him. Let me show you how this is foretold in the Psalms: He who has eaten my bread has lifted up his heel against me;^[1] and in another place, My friends and my neighbors drew near and set themselves against me;^[2] and again, His words were smoother than oil, and yet they are real darts. What then is meant when it says that his words were smooth? Judas came to Jesus and said to him, Hail, Master, and kissed him.^[3] Thus through the soft blandishment of a kiss he implanted the execrable dart of betrayal. In response the Lord said to him, Judas, do you betray the Son of Man with a kiss?^[4] You observe that he was appraised by the traitor’s covetousness at thirty pieces of silver.

Moreover there is this by the great favor of almighty God; that among those who are divided from the doctrines of the holy church there is no unity, since every kingdom divided against itself shall not stand.^[1] And holy church is always more thoroughly equipped in its teaching when assaulted by the questionings of heretics; so that what was said by the psalmist concerning God against heretics is fulfilled, They are divided from the wrath of his countenance, and his heart has drawn near. For while they are divided in their wicked error, God brings his heart near to us, because, being taught by contradictions, we more thoroughly learn to understand him.

All of them will stand about Job when the Judge of human life will gather together the universal church, when the trumpet that is to announce the coming of the King calls loudly to the tombs and demands the bodies that have been entrusted to their charge. Then, they who now appear to be dead will take their place before the Maker of the whole world more quickly than will the living. For this reason, I think, the Lord allotted to Job a double portion of his other wealth but judged that he would be satisfied with the same number of children as before. Do you see how many blessings the just Job reaped from his patience? You, also, should therefore bear patiently any harm that may have come to you from yesterday’s fire enkindled by a demon’s treachery, and alleviate your feelings of distress over your misfortune with more courageous thoughts, in accordance with the words of the Scripture: Cast your care on the Lord, and he will sustain you.

But do not lament a burden that surpasses your^[1] strength. For if you were the one destined to bear this responsibility alone, it would not be merely heavy but utterly unendurable. But, if the Lord is the one who helps you bear it, Cast your care on the Lord, and he himself will bear it. Only, let me urge you in all things to guard against this—that you be not carried along with others by wicked customs, but that through the wisdom given to you by God you change the formerly adopted evil practices into something good. For Christ has sent you, not to follow others but that you yourself may guide those who are being saved.

With this in mind, then, let each of us apply the remedies from Scripture appropriate to ourselves. This, you see, is the reason these matters are freely proposed to everyone: people of good will are able to apply the fitting remedy to the ailment that is threatening them and secure a rapid return to health—provided someone does not resist the healing processes of the treatment but rather gives evidence of personal gratitude. There is, after all, no ailment of soul or body besetting the human race that cannot come to healing from this source. Why is that, tell me? A person comes to this source burdened with care and the pressure of affairs and on that account is overwhelmed with despair on entering—only to hear at once the words of the inspired author, Why are you grief-stricken, my soul, and why do you trouble me? Hope in God, for I shall praise him, my God, the help of my countenance.^[1] Receiving sufficient encouragement from this, he goes away throwing off all that faintheartedness. Likewise another person is oppressed by poverty and at his last gasp, depressed at seeing others flush with money, full of their own importance and putting on airs; this person in turn hears the words of the same inspired author, Cast your care on the Lord, and he will sustain you; and again, Do not worry when someone becomes rich and the luxury of his house increases, because at his death he will not take any of it with him.^[2] Another person, too, is in dire straits through being subjected to scheming and calumnies and finds life insupportable, unable to find human help from any quarter; but this person too is instructed by this blessed author in the midst of such terrible difficulties not to take refuge in human resource—listen, after all, to his words, While I remembered them in prayer, they spoke calumnies against me.^[3] Do you see from what source he looks for assistance? Other people, he is saying, concoct schemes and calumnies and plots, whereas I take refuge in the unassailable rampart, in the firm anchor, in the haven waves cannot threaten—that is, in prayer, by means of which all difficulties are made light and easy for me.

May human obedience never withdraw itself from the grace of God, nor may it fall from that good without which it cannot be good. If it feels anything impossible for itself or arduous in the performance of the commandments, let it not abide in itself but return to the one who commanded it, for he gives an order to excite desire and afford help, as the prophet says: Cast your care on the Lord, and he himself will support you. Are there any so immoderately proud that they assume themselves to be so perfectly untouched and unstained that they need no renewal? Such an opinion is thoroughly mistaken, and they grow old in excessive vanity if, among the temptations of this life, they believe themselves immune from every wound. Everything is full of danger, everything full of pitfalls. Desires drive us, enticements lure us, money attracts us, loss hinders us, and the tongues of slanderers are bitter. The mouths of those who praise us are not always trustworthy; here hate rages, there a lying service deceives, so that it is easier to avoid discord than to escape falsehood.

In your zeal for good works and your contempt of human praise, be careful lest you wish to assign the good that you do, not to the grace of God but to your own strength. Hold firmly that there can be no ability in you for good will or good works unless you received it by the free gift of divine mercy. Know, therefore, that it is God working in you both to will and to do, for a good will. Accordingly, work out your salvation in fear and trembling. Humble yourself in the sight of God that he may exalt you. Ask from him the beginning of a good will. Ask from him the effects of good works. Seek from him the gift of perseverance. Do not think at any time that you can either will or do anything good, once his assistance has ceased. Ask him to turn away your eyes lest they see vanity; ask him to show you the way in which you should walk; petition him to direct your steps according to his word, and let no wickedness rule over you. Pray to him that he direct the works of your hands for you. Be strong and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord.^[1]

If you believe that God makes provision for you, why be anxious and concerned about temporal affairs and the needs of your flesh? But if you do not believe that God makes provision for you, and for this reason you take pains to provide for your need separately from Him, then you are the most wretched of all men. Why even be alive or go on living in such a case? Cast thy care upon the Lord, and He will nourish thee, and you shall never be dismayed at any terror that overtakes you.^[1]