Not only is this life painful, but it is also frightful, because, after being wounded, I am now in the condition to fear the blows of the Lord. This is why I jump from one place to another in fright, like those slaves who are threatened by their master. In addition, every day, like laborers who wait for their wages—and the wages are all their wealth and hope for nourishment—I also wait for the reward of my endurance, but I never meet it, because a long time and many months have passed. In those days I have exhausted myself in waiting for an empty hope.

And yet if we take Job’s words as the voice of the holy church universal, doubtless we find it at one time sunk to the earth by the corruption of the flesh, at another time by the defilement of dust. For [the church] has many within it who, while devoted to the love of the flesh, become corrupt with the putrefaction of excess. In addition, there are some people who certainly keep from the gratification of the flesh, yet grovel with all their heart in earthly practices. So let holy church speak through the words of one of its members, let it express what it endures from either sort of person. My flesh is clothed with corruption and the defilement of dust. It is as if [the church] said in plain words, There are many who are members of me in faith, yet these are not sound or pure members in practice. For they either are mastered by foul desires and run to and fro in corruption’s rottenness, or, being devoted to earthly practices, they are soiled with dust. For in those whom I have to endure, people filled with wantonness, I do plainly lament for the flesh turned corrupt. And in those from whom I suffer, those who are seeking the earth, what else is this but the defilement of dust that I bear?

My days pass more swiftly than the weaving of cloth by the weaver. In a very suitable image, the time of the flesh is compared with a cloth web. As the web advances thread by thread, so this mortal life passes day by day; in proportion as the web increases, so it advances to its completion. Just as we said before, while the time in our hands passes, the time before us is shortened. Moreover, of the whole length of our lives, the days to come are proportionally fewer to those days that have gone by. ^[1] HOPE IN THE NEW WORLD. ISHO‘DAD OF MERV: My eye will begin to see good again. Here the author refers to the hope that is reserved for people in the new world. ^[1]

For the human eye is the pity of the Redeemer that softens the hardness of our insensibility when it looks upon us. Hence, as the Gospel witnesses, it is said, And the Lord turned, looked upon Peter, and Peter remembered the word of the Lord. And he went out, and wept bitterly.^[1] However, when the soul is divested of the flesh, the human eye does not henceforth see anything. The Redeemer’s pity never delivers anyone after death that it has not gracefully restored to pardon before death.

As the body’s house is a bodily habitation, so it becomes to each separate mind its own house to whatever the mind desires to have enter. And so there is no more returning to his own house, because once a person is given over to eternal punishment, he is henceforth no more recalled from the place he had attached himself in love.

For in holy Scripture a bed, a couch or litter usually represents the heart’s secret depth. Hence, the spouse in the Song of Songs, urged by the piercing darts of holy love, speaks under the likeness of each separate soul: By night on my bed I sought him whom my soul loves.^[1] For the beloved is sought by night and lying in bed, much as the appearance of the invisible Creator is found in the chamber of the heart, apart from every image of a bodily appearing. Thus Truth says to those same lovers of him, The kingdom of God is within you.^[2] And again, If I do not go away, the Comforter will not come.^[3] As if it were in plain words, If I do not withdraw my body from your gaze, I will not lead you by the Comforter, the Spirit, to the perception of the unseen. The psalmist also states concerning the just, The saints shall be joyful in glory, they shall rejoice upon their beds;^[4] for when they flee the mischief of external things, they exult in safety within the recesses of their hearts. But the joy of the heart will then be complete when the fight of the flesh shall have ceased outwardly. It is as if when the wall of the house is shaken, the bed itself is disturbed. This is so as long as the flesh allures.

I beg of you. Take away my life. Deliver me from my pains through death. In fact, you did not create me immortal. So. . . may [I] enjoy quiet and tranquility in the future. I do not demand, O Lord, anything contrary to your decree. You made me mortal, not immortal. Therefore bring me death. Moses prayed with these same words by saying, If that is your purpose for me, then kill me.^[1]

It is necessary, actually, to call that time morning, because it is entirely light and drives the night away from this life. You judge them for the time of rest, that is, not for the torments but for the delights and the reward. He, who is now constantly worthy of the visit of God, will receive then his judgment for the rest.^[1] He is judged with the righteous, that is, is received [in heaven] together with the righteous, so that it may be known, in accordance with them what part is assigned to him and what is his destiny. Must he be placed with the patriarchs, or the prophets, or the apostles or the martyrs?

What does Job mean when he says, What shall I be able to do for you? What should I do in order to expiate my fault, in order to be reconciled with you? O you who understand the human mind, why did you make me to be your accuser? Job speaks this way not because he accuses God—God forbid!—but because what has happened to him raises a serious accusation against God. That is why he says, You who understand the human mind. Even if they do not speak, you know their secret thoughts and all their intimate reflections, such a righteous man has suffered such tremendous misfortunes! But Job does not have the attitude of a man who tries to justify himself. In fact, he has not said, I am righteous. Rather, they are deeply concerned about me, and that is why they have complained against you because of my trials.